Life is good again...

Violet is doing great! The mass seems to have completely disappeared. She is all done with radiation and only has 2 more shots of her vaccine left.
Kids are also doing very well. Max succesfully compeleted his MCAS (standardized tests in MA)last week and also presented his Science Fair Project on Friday. What a difference a year makes. Last year at this time we were on the verge of looking for some sort of in patient program for Max, in daily contact with our attorney and the stress levels in the house were immense. Fast forward to today and Max is studying the rise and fall of Communisim in the Soviet Union and the sound of his giggling permiates the house. Sarah is a joy and bright ray of sunlight as she skips throughout the house searching for "faerie houses" and "enchanted" objects with her best friend Aviva.
Once again I am blessed to be able to enjoy my children growing up with some sense of "normalcy" each having a "best friend", playdates and school projects. Now, don't get me wrong, living life on the spectrum of autism is and will always be a challenge, but now the daily challenges we face deal are more of the internal workings of living with Asperger's, as opposed to the rights of my child to a fair and appropriate education and basic respect.

And now a word about Violet...

To continue the animal saga. Violet was diagnosed with Melanoma in January (during the infamous Flint vs the Costco Chicken dietary indiscretion). Two weeks ago they started her on an experimental xenogenic vaccine that has been promising and she had her first radiation treatment on Friday. She did great with both and will continue getting radiation once a week and the vaccine every two weeks. If any of this is going to help we should now in the next three weeks. Keeping our fingers crossed.
Oh, and I think I may have forgotten to mention that we have added to our household in the last few weeks.
It all started when I decided that Sarah was in need of something special. She is always very patient and understanding about being the "token neurotypical" child in most any given situation. She is a junior "buddy" at skating, and probably will be a baseball this spring. She is a good sport at bowling and all of the other "sibling" activities that she attends at Max's School. So I ask her "Sarahbean, you've been doing such a great job being helpful, what would you like that mommy could get you?" I am thinking, American Girl Doll, Spa Day, Girls Day, Day off of School for no reason....Noooo. She looks me straight in the eye and without missing a beat says, "Mommy - I want a RAT". Deep breath..."A rat?" "Yes, mom I want a rat. Max had a hamster when he was younger than me. Rat are smart and curious and they like to be with people - I want a Rat." So I do the old, "Well, that's a big responsibility caring for another little creature, we'll have to talk to Daddy about it, I don't know that that is something that we can do right now..." The next morning she comes skipping into the back parlour from the kitchen. "Daddy said yes, Daddy said yes, I can have a RAT!"
So now we have 2 rats (apparently they need the company). Aphrodite (named of course by Sarah because "she is beautiful, but she can be mischievous and can get herself into trouble" just like the goddess) and Peanut (named by Max, "'cause she's cute...")
Pictures to follow...

Oh how time flies...

I can't believe that it's March already. Here is an update on what's been going on in the Kay-Baker household. We last left you with the wonderful news of NO CANCER. Yippee! We had a quiet and uneventful Christmas holiday here at home. Then came January 3rd, a day which will forever be etched in our memories as "The day of the $7,000 Costco Chicken". My girlfriend Pam and I went shopping at Costco that day and I decided that I desperately wanted one of those rotisserie chicken. After wanting for what seemed like HOURS (ok, it was only 20 minutes) the chickens were ready and off we went. As usual we were cutting it close with getting home, unloading the groceries out of Pam's car, and making it on time to pick up the kids at school. So in my haste I left the chicken on the counter.

Well...I came home 15 minutes later to find Flint (the yorkie) madly devouring said chicken. Violet (the pug) was sound asleep, and because she is deaf, didn't hear the debacle that was taking place in the kitchen and missed on the foul ordeal. We call Meg (who is now a Vet) she says watch him closely. We do, the next day he is miserable. We bring him in, 2 x-rays later, he is in surgery having LARGE bones removed from his stomach that would have otherwise passed. While in surgery they realize just how bad all of this is. He has developed a severe case of pancreatitis and will require round the clock hospitalization to pull him through, the recommend Mass Vet Referral Hospital in Woburn.

So...I pick up Flint on Friday 5:30 pm rush hour to transport him to Mass Vet Ref. He is tucked into a laundry basket layered with towels and polartec blankets (remember it's January here) he is still very out of it since he has only been out of surgery an hour or two and still has all of his IV lines hooked up. He is in in the front passenger seat. All is well, I merge onto 93 north and we are crawling at about 20 miles an hour and then BAMB 3 car accident. I couldn't make this up if I tried. The guy in front of me gets out (who gets out in the middle of 93 during friday night rush hour I don't know, but he did) and starts swearing and yelling, and here I am - with FLINT next to me - who has somehow managed not to go flying into the windshield. I try to dial 911 - all circuit are busy. WHAT! Try again, same thing, finally third try and I get through. "Are you the car on fire?" the 911 operator asks me, "No" I answer, turns out about a half mile behind us there is a raging car fire.

Anyhoo, other than a bad bruise from the seat belt we were able to drive away. I delivered Flint to the hospital where he remained for a week, not getting any better. The costs were getting up there and we decided to take him home. Meg showed Randy how to give him sub q fluids and shots of anti nausea meds and pain meds. 3 days later he finally started to eat (boiled chicken no less) and has now made a complete recovery. He is back to chasing balls, barking obnoxiously, and being an all around complete, if not cute nudge...

Next installment - Violet goes to the oncologist

NO CANCER!!!

Sorry it has taken me so long to update everyone. My head is still kinda spinning. We had Randy's appointment with his surgeon yesterday. We waited 45 minutes. Turns out she was on the phone getting the pathology results. The first thing she said as she walked into the room was "Well, you must have been a very good boy to get this for Christmas..." Randy got it right away. Me, not until she actually said the words, "NO CANCER" did I finally understand.
NO CANCER
NO CANCER
NO CANCER
Thanks to everyone for their thoughts and prayers. You have no idea how much it meant to us.
Happy Holidays to everyone...

You never stop wondering - why...

Sarah is working on a project where she needs to write about her family and provide pictures. This project was due last week, but I asked her teacher for an extension, because of all that was going on preparing for Randy's surgery. Or so I thought. Turns out that it wasn't because of the upcoming surgery at all. I've been putting off helping her because it meant that I would have to go digging through old photographs. Particularly photos of my mom. I have boxes and boxes of them. I haven't looked at any of these photos in years. Sure I have a few photos of my mom around. Hell, there is a 3.5 ft x 4.5 ft portrait of her as soon as you come into the house. I see these photos everyday, I walk by the portrait a least a dozen times a day. But somehow going through all the photographs looking for one of my mom with Sarah was excruciatingly difficult. Mom and Sarah at Disney when Sarah was 5 months old. Mom feeding Sarah her first solid food. Sarah and Mom at Christmas in Ottawa. Sarah and my mom at Cindy's wedding. I know there is happiness and love in those pictures, but I can't seem to see any of that in her eyes in those moments. Sure she is smiling and looks great, but I just can't get past knowing what was to come. The knowing now taints every photo of her that I look at, every memory that I hold. I want to know why, why weren't we enough to keep her here. How could Max and Sarah not be enough to keep her here. I know how much she loved them. Why, why wasn't that enough...
This time of year is always a challenge, I really thought that I was going to be able to sail through this one this year. Last year was tough, first year without Grand Father Jack. This is our fourth year without my mom and it doesn't get any easier. The pain is always there, you just get used to it, and you are left forever wounded.

The Weather Outside is Frightful

Day 3 home from the hospital and Randy is puttering around, frustrated that he can't do stuff, but behaving. Yesterday dumped about 1 foot of snow on us. At some points it looked like a white out outside the kitchen window. When most of the storm seemed to have passed, I looked out to see our neighbours, the Carroll's, the Maher's, Elizabeth and Elliot, snow blowing, shoveling, and digging us out. How blessed are we...There is no way that I would have been able to manage even getting out the door on Sunday.
A little later the doorbell rings and there is our friend Christina, food, flowers and chocolate in hand. Tom, her husband never does make it in. He immediately starts shoveling out the cars in the driveway.
Without everyones help we wouldn't have been able to get out this morning at all. As it was in my first minute outside today I slipped out on the ice and landed smack my knee on the concrete - so graceful.
Everyone has been so supportive, and Randy and I are very grateful. Thank you to all for the numerous e-mail and phone messages wishing him well.
Randy has a follow up appointment late Friday afternoon, where we hope we will get the pathology results and that Randy won't be going in for round 2. Keep your fingers crossed.

Randy is doing GREAT

Surgery went as planned and Randy is doing very well.
The morning started off a little hectic. With the huge storm that hit the north east, both kids schools were open BUT Max's bus company wasn't providing transportation. Pam's husband Dan works in the same town and drove Max. After packing up the kids with their overnight bags, sleeping bags, backpacks and lunches, we dropped Max off with the Bybells and then dropped Sarah off at school (and ran into Pam walking Oreo). Then it was off to the hospital. Randy was checked in and then I went off to have some breakfast (in a show of solidarity - I skipped breakfast and coffee - that is how much I LOVE my husband - I skipped COFFEE. Well at least until he was checked in - then it was hello Eggnog Latte...) The wait was excruciating and long. Of course the only 5 minutes that I left the surgical waiting room was when the surgeon came out to talk to me. Randy was in recovery for a few hours before he was transferred up to the hospital.
In the end we ended up with a private room with a GREAT view of Boston. Randy looked very good coming out of surgery. Nothing like he looked after the surgery back in 2003. He was allowed to have dinner and had "Grilled swordfish with Mango chutney, salad with mesculin greens, goat cheese, dried cranberries, and raspberry vinaigrette and Carrot Cake for desert" this was off of the hospital menu!
A few hours later Randy was still hungry, so I scored him a roast turkey sandwich, which he promptly inhaled. Safe to say I think our boy is feeling OK. He did have a little discomfort and headache but was in great spirits.
Thank you to all of you who were thinking of us. Thanks to our good friends the Bybells, the Michas', the Krug-Brandeis', the Carrolls, and Leslie.
Randy is scheduled to be released this morning. Stay tuned